Lisa Virtue:

So excited to have my guest Kenny here. Thank you, Kenny, for coming and talking to us. Male's perspective of the women in your life and give a little boost of empowerment today. I'm excited for that, too, for the listeners.

Kenny J:

Thank you so much. Thank you for getting me on. I appreciate it.

Lisa Virtue:

Yeah, absolutely. I love talking to men about the topic of women because we talk about our own gender a lot, don't we? Men talk about male problems, women talk about women problems. Sometimes we talk about each other, but with ourselves. So would love to hear your perspective on kind of women in the workplace and all of that. But before we dive into that, let's talk about you and your story and what compelled you to write your beautiful song that you just released. So please share your story.

Kenny J:

Well, you mentioned it earlier. It's very clear that men and women are on two sides of the spectrum. But I think, to some degree, I think we should meet each other in the middle. I think because of our differences, difficult to meet each other in the middle, which causes so many. So many different things. I think it's important for me as a male, such a. Such as it a woman to a male. Males.

Men need to make sure that we speak good energy into the lives and into the minds of women. I do think that it should be a two way street with that, but being that I'm a man, I kind of have to speak from this perspective. So, um, writing the song, it was much so that men have to speak good information or good positive energy to women. Um, as an artist, I see so many different things happening in the industry that's so disrespectful towards women. And it's got to be a different way to sell a record than to, um. I mean, I'm not saying not be creative, but when your creativity turns disrespectful and degrading, that's the problem. I see. So, as an artist, as a creator, a creative, it's important for me to use my gift to put that positive energy into the atmosphere, into the world.

This song basically spoke to empowering women. I have daughters coming up. I have a son that needs to see his dad speaking those good energies into a woman. I do not desire for him to be of this world, and he is just not being productive as far as respecting women. I am of the mindset that women can run the world. I am not of the mindset that men are better than women or women are better than men. I think that has to point to your skillset and what you're able to do. And sometimes because we kind of seem to be somebody sort of male dominant world, men seem to take charge a lot.

I'm not saying that they shouldn't lead, but women should have a place to lead also. And it just shouldn't be how the music industry, in no uncertain terms, kind of portray them. They're worth more than just sitting on top of a nice looking car. They're worth more than to disrespect. You guys bear children. Um, that in itself is one thing a man can't do. So, uh, it's important that, um, we put that energy in the world. And for me, um, I struggle with whether or not I should sing it or whether I should just kind of give it to a female to sing.

But it's a part of me was just like, man, what? What the heck? Just kind of put it out and just kind of give that male perspective. Um, hopefully it could just be the start of great conversations that I've been having about it, and hopefully it'll kind of catch on. It was something different than what we see normally in the music industry. And I just wanted to be a part of just creating a different headspace and, you know, a different space to give positive back to women.

Lisa Virtue:

So I love that. And as much progression as we feel like we have with our gender equality, especially at work, you know, you're talking about a career space. Music industry is a career space. And so many women come out later and have to say, oh, this is how I felt, or this is what I did. And it's great to see things like Taylor Swift and her incredible journey as a musical artist. And even there, there's some questionable things. My daughter's eight, and she loves Taylor Swift, but, you know, even watching her tour on Disney plus last week, I was like, there's still, you know, this is all about female empowerment, however.

Kenny J:

Exactly, exactly.

Lisa Virtue:

Still things that even women tend to lean into and might not be the best way for us to get out of that. It's hard to make a change. So, yeah, I love what you're doing.

Kenny J:

It's healthy. I'm sorry to cut you off. It's healthy for when men see those sorts of nuances that a woman sometimes feel like they have to compromise who they are for some other thing. So a man should feel empowered enough to say, I'm sorry, sweetheart, you do not have to feel like that. How do you want to handle this? I think it's important that we stand up for what is right. You know what I mean? No one should feel less than. No one should feel like they're inferior. No one should feel like they have to bow down to anything.

That's kind of against what they and who they are. If whoever you are, whatever that may be, that's between you and whoever she has no better than anybody else, it.

Lisa Virtue:

Should be your choice for sure.

Kenny J:

Absolutely. Yes.

Lisa Virtue:

Yeah. I love that.

Kenny J:

Yeah.

Lisa Virtue:

Well, and you're talking from a perspective of a father, which is also. I see a lot of wonderful men that once they have a daughter, it's like, whoop, the light bulb goes off. Right? Oh, a little different perspective here going on. So I see that a lot, for sure. Which. Powerful. And I see a lot of men that will empower their daughters even before a partner. Interesting.

Right. There's sometimes different dynamics there.

Kenny J:

Yes.

Lisa Virtue:

And I know that you unfortunately, lost your wife recently.

Kenny J:

Yes.

Lisa Virtue:

I'd love for you to tell us about her and your story.

Kenny J:

Yeah. 2023. Last year, June, we lost her to some complications due to a health condition. It affects the world, and hopefully we can find some help into finding some ways to make that better. She was certainly an educator. She loved children with autism. She was a strong individual, very upright in just trying to make sure everything goes perfectly. She raised our children in that way, and she certainly was a force to be reckoned with.

She was very powerful, and we lost her. And I had to kind of switch the narrative that it's a mourning sort of thing. You know, sometimes we get into the space where we're sad to see them go, and although I am sad to see her go, I have this perspective that, you know, she is in no more pain, and, you know, she is, you know, gracing the world, flying around, enjoying herself. So I do take on the space that she's looking down, and she's, you know, she's doing what she can in the spirit to make sure that we're okay. Okay. So I am not necessarily sad, but I am sad. So it's kind of a double negative. So she's not here anymore, but I understand.

I understand. And all I could do now is be a part of, as I continue to do it. So I did it when she was here, is to make sure that when I'm singing a song or when I'm presenting that I'm presenting positive energy, I need to present positive essences that's going to help promote change and help correct something that could have been broken. So I am a creative in that way that I like to provide answers. I do not like to leave it up in the air and you figure it out. No, my personality is, let's see what we can do to provide some change and provide some answers. It's difficult. Life is difficult.

You know what I mean? We do not need negative energy. The disrespect of women, the disrespect of men, the disrespect of culture, the disrespect with whatever choice you choose for your sexual partner, whatever that may be, it causes you a human being. You know what I mean? First of all, we are human beings, and we should be treated as such. So she was certainly an educator for many, many years, and she loved it. Loved it to a point where she was sleepless nights up, making sure that all of her paperwork was enforced in place, and she did something called ieps and all of these sorts of things. And she was certainly an advocate to help these kids get to their educational goals, and she was very successful in it.

Lisa Virtue:

Wow, that's amazing. So for you to see your wife in a career that she loved, working so hard at it, doing the individual educational plans, I'm familiar with that. My needs, autism. And there is so much work to be done in that space, too. That sounds like you were a great advocate to watching her thrive and get her energy from that work.

Kenny J:

Yeah. Although there are some times when I'm like, okay, at some point you need to go to sleep.

Lisa Virtue:

Yeah. You know, we want our loved ones to be taken care of, too. For sure.

Kenny J:

Yeah. It's like telling me to get out of the studio, which is kind of hard to do that. So whatever your passion is or whatever drives you to do it, do it because it's in your gift. I think your gifts causes you to kind of create a space where it's positive. You know, she's doing the education, I'm doing the music, and I enjoy the creative space where we could be positive and create change. So that's my life, and I'll stick to that.

Lisa Virtue:

I love that.

Kenny J:

Yes.

Lisa Virtue:

Beautiful. And I have so many men in my life, too. I. You know, I'm all about talking about women and gender equality in the workforce, but at the end of the day, we need each other. It's not one gender can do without. Right. It's just, how do we make a space where women have choice? Which is right back to what we're talking about, the music industry, too. I don't want to sound like I'm knocking on Taylor, because that's what I'm saying.

Kenny J:

Right, I get it.

Lisa Virtue:

But to clarify is, like, as long as it's her choice. Right. If there's something provocative that's going on, as long as the woman feels really good about it and feels like it's helping others and themselves have that, you know, like you're saying, go for it. But there, there is also that time, especially in music and entertainment, where it can be very devastating someone else, and in particular women, because then it becomes an objectification or something.

Kenny J:

Absolutely. It creates such an environment, and it's generational. So if you don't get healed from that issue, you know, you tend to pass it on to your child or to someone else. And we have to, have to, have to, have to. I cannot stress this enough. We have to make sure that we see those issues and deal with them. Then sometimes we wait and we have so many different things that come up and look at our music industry now, you know, you know, we can see so many things that's going on that didn't just happen yesterday. You know what I mean? You know, some people have been in the business for 30 or so years.

Why wait that long? It's like, shouldn't, no money should keep you away from living a full, healthy life. I don't care how much it is. There's no amount of money worth your life and you living it peaceful. It's important that we put those things in the earth, in the atmosphere, to make sure that we can give these people, you know, time to process it. And I know some people are a little scared. Just. Just get healthy. Get right, get healed.

So that's what we're trying to do, just get healed. So I want to be a part of the. All of the healing. And you're a woman, just speaks to that. And hopefully it'll create some change. At least they'll know it from my perspective, how I feel about. Yeah.

Lisa Virtue:

Yes. And, you know, this even pops up in subtle ways when my first job out of college, I was promised all sorts of things. Well, at the end of the day, I got some feedback. I wasn't smiling at the founder enough when he was walking in the door. I wasn't even on his side of the building. Right. But he would walk through the door. I didn't think it was my place to bother him.

So that was the feedback I got, and I understood my place all of a sudden as the woman that was at the front of the building that, oh, I'm supposed to be smiling. Okay, interesting. Let's just say I didn't last very long, but those, even those subtleties can come up in because we're talking about women in a woman's day that you realize, and then instead of accepting that, how can we feel like we do have advocates like Kenny J. Over here, they're saying, no, lady, don't. Don't take that. Stick with your values. Get out of there. Do something different.

Kenny J:

So he should have walked in with a level of glee and happiness to see that someone is beautiful as you is sitting down there making sure that people come in and get what they need to get. So there's a responsibility that even a person in that caliber has. Has. So when you come in, be inviting. Hello. Good morning. How are you having?

Lisa Virtue:

Yeah, exactly. He had someone else tell it. Tell me. You know, it's one of those things. It's like, just come up to me, say, hey, I would really appreciate, you know, when I come in, blah, blah, blah. But, yeah, after that, I. We had a great relationship, actually. But it was very bizarre the way that even that feedback and the fact that I realized, like, this is not what I signed up for.

I just came out of college with, you know, bright eyed and bushy tailed. I'm not going to sit here and smile all day at the desk. That is not daughter.

Kenny J:

My daughter has the same mindset. My daughter has the same mindset. Like, baby, you got to smile for what I'm like. Just a little bit. Just being biting.

Lisa Virtue:

I do agree with that. Yeah. But for men and women, not just ladies.

Kenny J:

Absolutely. That's very true. Very true.

Lisa Virtue:

I love it. Is there anything else you would like to share with the listeners about women at the workplace or feeling empowered? Anyone? If they're feeling down today, what words of wisdom do you have?

Kenny J:

If you're feeling down today, continue to push. Push love, push peace, push happiness. Whatever you have to do to make sure you are okay, do that. If it causes you to have to redirect your career, do that. If it causes you to have to take a chill and go home and just relax and take a u day, do that. Whatever you have to do. Ladies, listen to me. Life is way too short for you to be paying attention to things that is not creating just joy and happiness around you.

Whatever that time you need, whatever that space you need, whatever that person you need, get it. Have a great time and live life. Do not get stuck in just being unhappy. Whatever issue you have, whoever tried to violate you, whatever you, feel free to go anywhere you need to go to make sure you get the healing that you need, because that is the thing that's going to get you better.

Lisa Virtue:

Love it. Thank you so much for sharing your message.

Kenny J:

Thank you so much.

Lisa Virtue:

Your energy. Thank you. Just pours out of you. So I will definitely include the link to your song. But how else can people support you in your music?

Kenny J:

Everywhere on social media, Kenny J. Wilkins on Facebook. Kenny J. On Facebook. I'm sorry. Yeah. On Instagram is Kenny Wilkins. And you can catch me on the website.

That's kennyjmusic.com.

Lisa Virtue:

Okay, beautiful. Thank you so much.

Kenny J:

Thank you.

Lisa Virtue:

Thank you so much.

Kenny J:

I want to call you coach. Coach Lisa.

Lisa Virtue:

Thank you so much.